Rabbit Warren

13 Jul

June 13, 2005: Fifty days until I head west to LA. I still don’t know if my magazine will appoint me the West Coast editor. We have a new publisher – the third in twelve months. The magazine would be foolish not to give me the position, but they’ve made plenty of foolish decisions in the past.

Even if I don’t have the cushion of a lateral move, I still have to go. My life is a joke if I don’t. I’m not on this world to be the caretaker of a mortgage and I won’t be a martyr to the materialism of the family. I’ll fight like an animal to protect Ann andDevon- but that doesn’t mean I’ll transmute any remaining soul I have left into a false responsibility to material things. I wouldn’t do it for a piece of furniture, I wouldn’t do it for a car and I won’t do it for a house.

If Ann wants to come along for the ride – fine.

But don’t ask me to tremble inside the rabbit warren.

(2005)

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